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Forbes Healthcare Summit
2014-12-03    
All Day
Forbes Healthcare Summit: Smart Data Transforming Lives How big will the data get? This year we may collect more data about the human body than [...]
Customer Analytics & Engagement in Health Insurance
2014-12-04 - 2014-12-05    
All Day
Using Data Analytics, Product Experience & Innovation to Build a Profitable Customer-Centric Strategy Takeaway business ROI: Drive business value with customer analytics: learn what every business [...]
mHealth Summit
DECEMBER 7-11, 2014 The mHealth Summit, the largest event of its kind, convenes a diverse international delegation to explore the limits of mobile and connected [...]
The 26th Annual IHI National Forum
Overview ​2014 marks the 26th anniversary of an event that has shaped the course of health care quality in profound, enduring ways — the Annual [...]
Why A Risk Assessment is NOT Enough
2014-12-09    
2:00 pm - 3:30 pm
A common misconception is that  “A risk assessment makes me HIPAA compliant” Sadly this thought can cost your practice more than taking no action at [...]
iHT2 Health IT Summit
2014-12-10 - 2014-12-11    
All Day
Each year, the Institute hosts a series of events & programs which promote improvements in the quality, safety, and efficiency of health care through information technology [...]
Design a premium health insurance plan that engages customers, retains subscribers and understands behaviors
2014-12-16    
11:30 am - 12:30 pm
Wed, Dec 17, 2014 1:00 AM - 2:00 AM IST Join our webinar with John Mills - UPMC, Tim Gilchrist - Columbia University HITLAP, and [...]
Events on 2014-12-03
Forbes Healthcare Summit
3 Dec 14
New York City
Events on 2014-12-04
Events on 2014-12-07
mHealth Summit
7 Dec 14
Washington
Events on 2014-12-09
Events on 2014-12-10
iHT2 Health IT Summit
10 Dec 14
Houston
Articles

Finding Out How Monkey Dong Could Be The Answer To Your Drug Test Prayers

monkey dong

Finding Out How Monkey Dong Could Be The Answer To Your Drug Test Prayers

We have certainly all been through those phases in our lives where every weekend and some days throughout the week were all about partying and living the good life. We didn’t have a care in the world. We could wake up right as rain the next day, swig back a quick pint, and get on with the day ready for another session when the time came.

As we get older the right as rain days aren’t as easy as they used to be. We are stiff in the mornings with aching joints and backs from tossing and turning all evening, and seeing a pint just adds to the headache from last night.

Then to top it all off you’ve landed a dream job where you make a salary even you were surprised you manage to earn with minimal effort, and showing up looking worse for wear may not go down as well as you would like.

Being in a situation.

However, there is a new sheriff in town who has taken over the reins and trying to make a name for himself and ensuring everyone knows where he stands, he is conducting staff drug testing. Beginning next week.

You feel a wet sheen begin to form on the back of your neck, your throat is suddenly dry, and your mind starts racing and wondering how you’ll pass this test in time. Urine tests aren’t easy to fool, but you remember a mate mentioning something that could help when all else fails, which in this situation seems to be the case.

This product, of which he had a great review, was his ticket to his employment. A gadget that when the powder product inside was mixed with water and filled the bag, a synthetic penis-shaped attachment would disperse imitation urine allowing you to essentially ‘pee in a cup’ without losing your job.

If it means that a detox option is not quick or efficient enough in time, what have you got to lose, right?But like with all testing, some more thorough than others, the results are not 100% guaranteed, if you’re pressed for time I say go for it.

4 Methods of passing a drug test.

We will do anything we can to not fail a test, whether it is a driving test, drug test, or a simple exam at school, nobody wants to fail so why should a simple sample in a plastic beaker change your future? If there is a way around it, do it.

• Synthetic urine. An increasingly popular choice for many people and the market is growing with availability, new versions and varieties are hitting shelves every month, choosing one that works best for you can make all the difference. Simply mix the powder and water and you have a test-passing sample.
• Detox. Sounds easier than it is, unless you abstain completely so the system naturally flushes out the substances, you are going to need a sped-up version, which there are online for purchasing. Some ideas here https://food.ndtv.com/food-drinks/how-to-naturally-detox-your-body-7-effective-tips-1886268 if you do have a bit of time to spare.
• Charcoal. More specifically activated charcoal. It has been proven to absorb poison and toxins due to the chemical reactions within the body, and when used at least a week before your test and with lots of water the success rate is significantly increased.
• Dilution. This method involves aspirin, a load of liquid, and close accessibility to a bathroom because you will be needing it a lot. Essentially it is about flushing out any traces of the substance in the system utilizing drinking non-stop, while it seems simple enough the steps to doing it correctly are more complicated, so take note.

There are various opinions on which works best and quickest when it comes to passing a drug test in a short amount of time, see what others have to say in this blog, but the main objective no matter the method you opt for is to convincingly pass. You do what you have to do to get the job done, am I right?

Have fun, always be safe, and live life how you see fit without trying to be what society dictates.